Chapter 2

It was another week of holiday coaching for the S.S 2 and S.S 3 students of RPHS. Another week of pretending to be learning when what we were actually doing was showing off our collection of beautiful and expensive clothes since we didn’t need to be in our school uniforms.

Holiday coaching was mainly a time for show off and an avenue for waywardness in my school. The coaching was compulsory for the S.S 2 and S.S 3 students while it was optional for other lower classes.

We were to resume a new session soon in which we had no choice other than to stay in the school hostel so as to be serious as the management put it.

It was the beginning of the fifth week of the coaching and I was very eager to get to school, not because I was eager to learn like my parents would think but because there was always a new gist to hear, no day passes by in RPHS without a drama, I’m not even exaggerating. It’s like a new school day can’t begin without some hilarious gist or something.

Anything to keep the students talking till day breaks.

I was dressed in one of my blue Jean trousers and a red sleeveless top with my black rubber slippers. I added a little brown powder which belonged to my mum to my face and then a sticky nude lip gloss on my lip and I was good to go!
I rushed out of our flat to meet Eniola waiting for me outside her own flat in the same compound. Eniola and I had been friends since Junior secondary school one even though we were literally the opposite of each other but then according to physics, like poles repel and unlike poles attract.

While I was a tall fair girl with a very dark long hair, I loved making up even though I was not good at it, Eniola on the other hand was a short dark girl who was always on low cut and liked to read a lot. She never puts on earrings, in-fact, she didn’t even pierce her ear, you could never see trousers and make up on her. Her skirts and gowns were always long, she was the typical description of an S.U (Scripture union) like Nigerians are fond of calling people like her.

She even liked overdoing hers, she doesn’t care about what she wears and how she looks like, she was a typical bookworm and asides that, she went to church almost everyday, I’m not even joking. Well, It was not like she had a choice though.

“Enny, couldn’t you at least comb your hair? This one that you are looking like Dada!” I teased her.

“Please, leave me alone! Not everyone has the time to be checking mirror every five minutes.” She snapped at me while I just rolled my eyes at her outburst, typical Eniola.

We boarded a taxi to school and as soon as we stepped foot on the school’s compound, Seun, one of my school daughters in J.S.S 2 rushed to my side.

“Senior Amy, did you hear about what happened?” She whispered without even greeting first. Seun loved to gossip a lot, she was always the first person to hear gists in this school, she’s like the news carrier. Don’t even think of keeping a secret with Seun because ten minutes later, you’d be hearing it from hundred other people.

“You couldn’t even greet? What is it?” I questioned ready to listen to the gist while Eniola just hissed.

Enny loved forming holy holy. She was too religious, she didn’t like liars, gossipers and show offs, so of course, she never liked Seun. Funny enough, I still don’t understand why she was friends with someone like me since I was all of that.

“They said that a Junior student in J.S.S 3 wrote a love letter to Senior Oreoluwa!”

Eh! Junior secondary school three student?!.

“Eh eh! Those girls that are yet to even have visible breasts! Wetin man no go hear in this school?So what did ore do?”

I asked irritated at the news.

Oreoluwa was one of the cutest boys in my class, most girls in my class liked him, some S.S 3 girls even wanted to date him. To be honest, I also did have a tiny crush of mine on him but I was not as shameless and desperate as some girls.
He was even the best student in my set and you know Nigerian school girls like following brilliant boys topped with the handsomeness cherry, at least in my own school.

“Trust Senior Ore now! He tore the letter and threw it at the girl just after reading the content to the crowd, I laughed, ehn!” Seun replied chuckling.

Now, even though Ore was the best student, he could be quite arrogant and troublesome, but then who cares, I had never gotten under his bad side before and the teachers overlooked his flaws too, he was the typical teacher’s pet.
“Aagh! I have missed a lot just this early morning. Enny, why didn’t we come earlier sef?” I asked while biting my fingers in mock regret.

“Early morning at 9.00am, it’s like you don’t know what you are saying!” Enny said hissing as she left.

“But what is wrong with this Senior Enny though? She acts as if she’s holier than God Himself!” Seun said as soon as Enny was out of sight.

“Nobody is holier than God. And leave her alone, is she your mate? Continue what were you saying, Who is the girl?”
“It is Funke na!” Seun answered as if she had told me the girl’s name before.

“Which Funke?” I asked even though I was already brainstorming about which Funke it could be.

“The same Funke that lives in the school hostel, that girl that used to wet her bed when she was in J.S.S 2, the one that is fat like this, teachers like calling her Omo Fela Kuti. Don’t you know Funke Anikulapo?”Seun said describing the girl in the most ridiculous ways she could even though she could have said the girl’s surname and I would have known who she was talking about. But knowing Seun, she had to put extra drama into every little thing.

Funny enough, she dare not call the girl’s name in her presence without adding senior.

“Wonders shall never end! So they are already giving that girl liver too? How could she even think of having a chance with Ore?!”

I was bewildered, here I was thinking of one fine Funke not knowing that it was orobo (fat) and smelly funke, I was not trying to body shame her or anything, I just love to call a spade a spade and not sugarcoat it.

Aside from being fat, that girl smelled like poultry, if you sit next to her for a long time, I promise you that you would faint due to her body odour, I’m not even exaggerating or anything.She was this short fat dark girl whose uniform was always worn out, dirty and untidy. Her hair was nothing to write home about, she also eats anything that looks like food and I mean anything.

Some people just really need to learn how to stay in their own lane and things would be fine.

“Let me go to my class and hear more of the gist, our civic education teacher will soon be here.” I said as Seun and I went our separate ways.